Shake, rattle and roll

I've recently acquired some new furniture. And I didn't even have to purchase it with my own hard-earned monies. The management of my apartment community was graceful enough to gift it to me. It really rounds out my place, since there are new pieces in the living room AND bedroom. (I'm a lucky gal.)

The new additions include a "massage chair" in futon form and one of those vibrating beds I thought only existed in sleazy motels in movies and cartoons. So what stemmed the atypical generosity? It seems they had a genius revelation in that industrial-sized air conditioners should sit atop one lucky apartment on the roof in my building. As you might have figured, I am the fortunate tenant.

So for anywhere from 20-40 minute increments, with no more than 10 minute breaks in between, my futon turns into a massage chair or if it's bedtime, my mattress turns into a belly shaker. Auditory ambiance is created through rattling frames on walls, track lighting and stove top burners. In addition, the more indirect rooms to receive such treatment contain an incessant, low "hum" ... if you can really call it that. You know those whistles with such high pitches only dogs can hear them? This sound is on the opposite end of pitch range, but I imagine what my ears experience is similar to that of those poor canines.

You can imagine the excitement I had to silence when I got to stay up until 4:30 a.m. last night to listen to the dulcet tones of air conditioner bliss. I had to stifle such excitement because I wouldn't want to wake anyone at that hour of the night/morning. I imagine I'm the only one who aches for opportunities to be kept up for such unique experiences.

P.S. I'm moving.