Huh?

Let me tell you about something I don't understand. Vera Wang Mattresses.

Ok, here's the deal. I can understand the desire/need/whatever to acquire designer names for the jeans on your booty (guilty), the shoes on your tootsies, the bag on your arm or even the unmentionables on your ... unmentionables. I get that. But a mattress? I mean really?

You cover your mattress with sheets, right? And the people who don't cover their mattresses with sheets ... well ... no offense, but those people probably aren't going to be purchasing a Vera Wang mattress anytime soon.

The only thing that comes close to the ridiculousness of having a designer name mattress is having designer named undies, only because if you aren't - for lack of better terms - "getting any", what's the point if no one's seeing them? But even those who don't plan on letting anyone see them in their skivvies will most likely give you the argument that wearing them just makes them feel better. Fine. But if anyone tries to offer that argument while bragging to me about their Vera Wang mattress, I'm calling their bluff because that's just b.s.